Just making physical advances or
forcing one’s sexual desires over the other does not constitutes the whole of
sexual harassment. The way the culprit looks at the person, certain actions he
does, also forms a part of this. It is generally believed that the children
need to be protected from these ridiculers outside the boundaries of the four
walls they live in. That is the reason why usually parents caution their kids
about the harassers roaming free outside. But normally they fail to acknowledge
the prospective danger inside their homes as well. The harasser takes this to
his advantage because he knows that in the disguise of the relationship he
shares with the child, he can do anything to her/him. Also, according to a
report of Ministry of Women and Child Development, at least 21% children are
sexually harassed by being kissed by their relatives or loved ones against
their will in the country. The child is unable to speak about it to anybody,
because she/he fears that nobody would believe her/him. Also the kid would be
so small of her/his age that she/he might not actually understand what is being
done to them.
Image courtesy: Google images |
In the book ‘One child,’ by
Torey Hayden, a six year old character Sheila, who was abandoned by her mother
(her mother dropped her at a highway) when she was four, suffers from severe
mental torture. She is been taken care of by a teacher in a special school for
psychologically disturbed children. There comes one point in the story when
Sheila is making frequent visits to washroom. Her teacher wonders as to what
could be the possible reason, unless she notices the bleeding on her pants. She
takes Sheila to washroom and fearfully unbuttons her pants and what she notices
is devastating. The little kid is trying to hide the bleeding by placing
multiple layers of tissues under her panty, which was caused by somebody who
stabbed a knife into her vagina. She tells her teacher that her uncle Jerry
(who used to often visit their house) did this. Uncle Jerry told Sheila that he
wants to love her and forced his penis into the poor little kid’s vagina, when
obviously she resisted and said that it is paining he stabbed a knife into it.
According to wikipedia, in a sequel to the book, ‘The Tiger's Child,’ it
is revealed that this incident makes Sheila infertile. The amount of mental and
physical torture that the child went through, one can hardly
imagine.
The role of any elderly or parents
is very much crucial in this case. The child could be explained that what kind
of touch is meant to harm them, which kind of approach is friendly or caring
and which one is potentially harmful for them.
Image courtesy: Google images |
There have been cases in India as
well relating to sexual abuse or harassment within the homes by a relative or a
family member.
There
was a little girl in the age of nine and something who could not make out what
her uncle were up to when he constantly used to touch her ass in the name of
loving the child. When she grew up she understood all of those gestures and
movements but still could not talk to anybody about it.
Another
girl who went through a kind of mental harassment was the time when she was in
her teens. Her uncle (her father’s sister’s husband) used to pay visit to their
house and numerous times she has caught the sight of him taking out his penis
and playing with it. She explains it as a very ugly sight also whenever he used
to come home drunk, and used to look at her in a lewd manner. It always used to
make her uncomfortable also when she used to sleep and the man consciously used
to try to touch her breasts. She once shouted because of this at night but
could not explain the reason why. But one fine day she spoke to her mother
about this. Her mother was shocked but said they could not do anything about it
since they share relations with them. She still cannot understand why was she
subjected to this hideous sight and why her?
Ignoring the initial actions
undertaken by the harasser can prove to be quite dangerous. He might get this
feeling that whatever he might do, nobody would catch hold of him. And he would
be constantly hunting for an opportunity to do more damage. In that case if he
is brought into the notice of the family much before, many gruesome situations
could be avoided.
Indian government laws relating to
sexual harassment exist even though not applied, either by the victim
herself/himself or by the authorities concerned. According to section 209 of
Indian Penal code, if anyone sings or utters obscene words or songs at public
place, then he can be imprisoned for a term of up to three months or can be
fined or both. Uttering any word or making any gesture intended to insult the
modesty of a woman can lead to imprisonment for one year or fine or both.
Indian Penal Code does not distinguish between women and child victims.
Henceforth, protection of children from sexual offences act, 2012, has been
passed by Lok sabha on 22nd may 2012. More information
relating to the law could be obtained from this link, http://equalityindia. wordpress.com/2012/05/23/the- protection-of-children-from- sexual-offences-act-2012- passed-children-in-india-get- a-new-law/
Kids need to be explained and should be made
that much comfortable that they talk their heart out without any inhibitions or
fear. They need to have the feeling that they are nowhere at fault and would
always be listened to and understood, no matter what comes into the way. This
fact should be emphasized by the parents again and again that they would be
loved, no matter what and should not feel embarrassed or guilty about anything.
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